Facts About John McCain

1. John McCain can divide by zero, thus defining his economic policy.

2. John McCain doesn't need to balance a budget, he scares it into collapse.

3. John McCain did not invent the Blackberry, he willed it into existence.

4. John McCain did not lose multiple planes, they simply could not contain that much power.

5. John McCain is not old, he has simply given up his body energy to hold together the Solar System.

6. John McCain defeated cancer by simply being more destructive than the disease.

7. John McCain's voice is the preferred method of execution in 10 states.

8. John McCain is not incontinent, he simply scares the shit out of himself.
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Okay I started lets get some more......

Nice Grip Johnny.....

The right is responding to the new Obama add that criticizes McCain for lack of technical savvy in world that demands it. They claim McCain was so brutalized by his jailers that he can no longer comb his hair or tie his shoes. A bit of a stretch when you consider these photos:

Ummm....Okey Dokey Then

Okay, I guess you can say I am NOT a big fan of the Olympics. In truth, I consider it a huge pissing contest amongst the international community. Countries shell out the big bucks for their teams, transport, etc and you know its perfectly okay to spend this money because, you know, if you went on their streets there's no poor homeless people wandering around, undernourished children, etc. However, even I was impressed by the Beijing Opening Ceremonies ...until I read this.

http://www.cbc.ca/olympics/story/2008/08/12/olympics-lipsynch.html

Sorry little girl. You're not cute enough to represent Mother China. You just sing in the background and we'll let the pretty kid take the glory. Also, the comparison to Pavarotti lip synching for Torino does not cut it. First of all, he was lip synching is own voice. Second of all, he was dying of Pancreatic cancer at the time. He lip synched because of a medical problem - its not like they took Orlando Bloom and him lip synching Pavarotti's voice.

Not to sound cynical - but in a country of more than one billion people they couldn't find a kid who was "cute enough" and could also sing? Oh wait! I forgot! They're on the gymnastics team.

Ein Prosit der Gemütlichkeit

McCain at the Sausage Haus
July 24, 2008 12:10 PM

ABC News' David Wright Reports: Today as his rival prepares to deliver a major address to the throngs in Germany, John McCain counter-programmed with a more modest event bound to invite comparisons.

Obama was at the Tiergarten in Berlin, amid a sea of people. McCain was at "Schmidt's Sausage Haus und Restaurant" in German Village, an enclave of Columbus, Ohio.

Word is that when Obama was in Israel, McCain countered by going to a shawarma joint in Manhattan.

Hail to The Chief

MARKING MY RETURN TO THE BLOGOSPHERE!!!!!

And if anyone can tell me why these damn popups are attached to my site I will bow in servitude.

Marvel vs DC

Or how Brett Ratner destoyed human civilization:



Marvel VS DC Comics - The best home videos are here

What Jon Stewart Said

A primer for the uninitiated, the ill-informed, or those with their heads so far up their ass they can measure their heart rate with their tongue.